Senecio adn Tide II

[VisAnastasis]

" Here. It took some time to design it, but generally, it uses the momentum and direction of remnants of fingers and hand to guide the movement. I tried to make it simple, but strong, with highest quality materials, so it doesn't break easily, but so it's not complex enough to be easy to fix in case he needs to maintain it himself... " Being said shyly, and he shyly and carefully pushed the object further, towards Svarik, so he could show it to him, without worry he'd come into his personal space. The object was elegantly built and seemed much unlike the typical prosthetics of the day - it didn't try to be realistic or paved with gold or diamonds, there was no pretentiousness to it - it was mechanical and sleek, but looked sophisticated and really expensive in its design and carefully picked textures and materials, as it was obvious lot of care was put into functionality - and also, judging by the firmness, ability to strike a rather hard punch if needed.

( I imagined it sort of like this, but with maybe a little more support for the wrist, in case it has to be used for defending oneself - but naked prosthetics make really amazing products that look very cool and functional, you can see a video here, it's mesmerizing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGriTgS4078 )

[Mirach]

"Honestly, that looks awesome. Has he seen it yet?" Svarik asked. 

[VisAnastasis]

" This is not a type of thing you want to surprise someone with. This is a human hand, not a human pie. " Creature snorted weakly, despite his weariness and faint appearance, the comment brought him out of some darker contemplative place. " You don't give someone just any hand... I passed through a couple designs with him. We compromised between looks and functionality, and in the end, refined one he liked the most... To be honest, I really prefer designs with cogs and gears. They have a certain old-world beauty that I enjoy. But this is a different world... A new one. " he murmured, turning the object in his hands carefully, moving joints, showing them how it worked. " I have been... analyzing modern fashion in technologies. I made it up to current human beauty standards... It's not just about function. I... wouldn't want him to get embarrassed. Is it... up to current visually pleasing human ideals? " he asked a little hesitantly. " I'd have asked Emmet, but it felt like a silly thing to ask... "

[Mirach]

"I think it looks quite nice, if that's what you are asking," Svarik said.

[VisAnastasis]

" I guess... quite good is fine, for the first time. " Being whispered slowly. He seemed to grow thoughtful again, and wonderingly, he caressed the metal thumb of the machinery. " It's easy enough to take off those things, much easier than prosthetics bound to the flesh, so... there's no custom that says I'm not allowed to make him more than one. I look forward to making him a couple of other nice ones... Maybe in different colours, too, that he can exchange at need like humans exchange human shirts... That way, he will always have a spare even if one or two gets damaged... "
" That's a really nice thought, but one is really a great start. You don't need to rush it when he'll already have one. It's great that you're thinking so deeply into this, but it doesn't have to be that deep..." Falcon noted carefully, looking suspiciously at creature's hands.
" I... did not say I will... always rush. It was just easier this time. Usually, my regeneration is pretty good, so I can just get myself cut all over with it healing quickly. It is... just not terribly fast when I don't eat well. It's not as bad as it looks... " he whispered, and he appeared tense under Falcon's intense look, as he felt more unsure with him than with Svarik and uncomfortable with his comment - and with a closer look, the king could see there was some blood around the discarded metal parts, and prototypes, and even a bit on the final product - as well as torn fur around bloody fingertips, king already noticed at the start. Creature self consciously took a cloth and cleaned out some stains.

[Mirach]

Svarik watched him as well. "I have to ask... that you cut yourself is a required or an accidental part of the construction of this?" 

[VisAnastasis]

" It isn't some... ritualistic practice if you aks that. " Creature murmured, a little torn from embarrassment by bafflement. " I don't often do such crude things, such as drawing blood to embed it into weapons and grant it bigger power, or mould flesh into things. I can, it's just rather barbaric practice. Besides, at what point is something alive, and how right it is to fashion objects with living flesh and blood? It is unpleasant for me, ethically. " he replied quietly, while quietly clearing out some meat chunks. " It's not accidental, though, either. This is just delicate work, with lot of delicate unique tools. You need to work slow not to hurt yourself... So it is easier just to hurt yourself and just let it heal later, then fiddle with something for two hours. That's how I checked out couple of more dangerous traps around. " he looked grimly, into the remaining mechanisms Guliermo made. " I don't... particularly enjoy, fiddling with objects of cruelty. You can fiddle and take everything apart for hours, and then have to put it together again... To remake something terrible. Or you can push your hand into the suspicious hole and let mechanism crush it, and figure it out in few minutes and get it over with. I had enormous vast tunnels of mechanisms to check in a short time, and back then... I wanted to get it over with quickly, so I... don't have to be around humans too long. So, when I would see something too complex to be worth the bother, I'd just... you know. Check what it does first hand. It is less of an emotional toll...  It's not a requirement, sometimes it's just not worth the effort to avoid getting hurt, compared to the efficiency of it... "

[Mirach]

"So it's because of the lack of time now?" Svarik asked. "It might be a good idea to tell that to Emmet, if you didn't, because he will certainly notice. You really should have a talk before we get to this."

(OOC: I just posted a new chapter, I'm not sure if I should tell you about updates or if you are subscribed?)

[VisAnastasis]

" He watched me making it for a big chunk of time, and I reassured him some shortcuts I took were mostly for the time constraint," he whispered, as he was cleaning out some blood, he looked unsure. " I... Am not really certain I should dwell on it. I do not like that... the appearance of sacrifice, you see. I do sacrifice something. I sacrifice the more food I must eat to make up for lost nutrients. " his voice wavered a little, as despite it was little conventionally, to him it wasn't a small thing, and it was harder for him to add the following. " But it is not... grand sacrifice, a sacrifice of food. Besides, Emmet did not rush me. I know you are only doing the cutting and healing part... I knew I can take two, three days, to make the hand, as that is not a long time without a limb, compared to never... But I wanted it this way. " he replied, despite previous nervousness, more firm in that statement, as his words grew softer. " I wanted him to have a hand as soon as he is healed, and all the more, a higher quality one, for a better experience. A more... expensive toy, if you will. There is no point on dwelling on something that only looks like a sacrifice but is actually an indulgence of my own... "


( OOC: Don't worry, I am not really good at settings, but apparently, once I subscribed to you, I get notifications on mail when you post stories, so I have seen the message, I put the tab at a side so I can read it after work <3 )

[Mirach]

"Alright, let's wait for him then," Svarik said.

(OOC: cool, I just didn't know if you are subscribed. I only see the number of subscribers, but no usernames)

[VisAnastasis]

The creature nodded, and he fell into silence, clearing out the table, first from blood and tissue, so that when kids come, they wouldn't be upset by it. Then, to busy himself, he gathered the tools and leftover metal, neatly packing it in his bottomless bag.

Soon enough, they heard a knock and when allowed in, the three boys went in. Behind them, Svarik and Conrad could see a new face, a tall Being that looked rather much like the depiction of shamans of fairy tales, packed with bags and in colourful clothes, with blue glowing eyes and glowing face, body neither male not female. It must have been Rain that Janus mentioned and creature nodded to him and whispered something on Spirit language to him, probably telling him all went well.

[Mirach]

Svarik greeted Rain after they were introduced, and them turned to Emmet. "So, how do you feel?" he asked. "May I talk to you in private?"

[VisAnastasis]

The boy looked pale, and a little dazed, unsure, as it must have been still hard for him to believe that it's really going to happen so. But although nervous, beneath the paleness there was some quality of firmness to his expression, as, despite it must have been frightening, he did not want to back down from this now. He looked at Janus at Svarik's proposal, but the Being did not know what the king wanted, or what the glance implied, it seemed - not really good at human conventions, instead of a gesture, he guessed he must be asking for permission, and murmured that he doesn't mind.
" Okay, if you are sure... " he nodded slowly to Svarik, too, and smiled shyly. " I guess the talk is alright, then... Should we go outside, to the stage? It's a bit crowded here, for a private talk... "

[Mirach]

"Yes, that would be better," Svarik nodeed. He went out to the stage and sat down on a seat in the first row, gesturing to Emmet to sit down as well. "I just wanted to ask if you haven't changed your mind and tell you that it's alright if you do change it, up until the very last moment. There is no pressure."

[VisAnastasis]

Emmet was sitting quietly beside him for a moment.
" It can not... hurt more than it hurts anyway," he whispered finally. " The pain is something you can just endure, and wait to stop... when and if it does. I am mostly afraid of going through this... and ending up worse than I started...  being able to do less than I could before," he admitted quietly, looking at his gloved hand anxiously. " I am not a healer, so I can not know what you know. It's just hard to believe... Will I... really fare better without one finger, than with it? "

[Mirach]

"Were it only a mechanical thing, if you had no feeling in the hand at all, that's the only case it would be better like this," Svarik said. "But the pain is too limiting, you will have a better range of movement and manipulation abilities without it, after the damaged part is removed. I know it's counterintuitive, so you will have to trust me on that. And this is only comparing your options without any prosthetics. With it, you will be without any doubt able to do much more than now."

[VisAnastasis]

Emmet nodded lightly, looking down, appearing rather vulnerable, and more like a child, with it.
" I... don't think I could bring myself to give up now, " he whispered. " I would like to say it's because I want to set a good example for the others... but it's not really that," he admitted. " Guillermo... Could afford it. He could get me prosthetics, but he never offered it. But mister Janus was making prosthetics sketches ever since we met. I am not saying the hope of getting food out of it doesn't go into it, but... It genuinely seems hard for him, to see creatures in pain. And... it is genuinely hard for me, to see his hunger, in turn. His diet may look unnerving, but he often seems so hungry that it hurts him... "  

[Mirach]

"You are sure, then? Both about doing it and about the way?" Svarik asked. "Did you tell him already?"

[VisAnastasis]

Emmet's face fell with that.
" It was... so hard to find the right moment," he admitted apologetically. " I know I should have done it by now... but I did not know how to do it, in a way that won't make him feel bad for it. It feels a simple thing, in my mind. I've been through worse for other's pleasure... so why couldn't I do this one unpleasant thing for his hunger? It would be a waste not to. " he whispered a little hoarsely. " It is a simple thing to me, and I want to say it simply because it is my truth. But if I say it bluntly as it is, I'm afraid he'd refuse. But I... I am also... sort of afraid... he'd grow to dislike me if I make him take it. I didn't really think I'd mind how he treated me for it at first, but more the time to ask him is nearing... more I see that I do... "

[Mirach]

"Well, we need to tell him before we do that," Svarik said. "We can't just throw it at him after it's done, can we?"

[VisAnastasis]

" Is it ... Foolish of me that I hoped we could? I couldn't help thinking it would be much easier if we just said this painkiller has side effect to paralyze for a bit. Would it be too ill fated of me to lie just a little?" Boy admitted faintly, pressing his temples with his healthy hand, as if trying to hide his face. " I know you won't get it... But all this is really hard to deal with. It would have been so easier if... If he just wanted me. I'd be able to show him my appreciation properly. I am good at putting my feelings into touch... But not... Whatever this is. I have no idea how to show my thanks when I can't do as much as shake his hand. When he is too uncomfortable with humans to want even as much as hold hands. He doesn't want or need anything from me. It's frustrating... to feel like you can't do anything. It's unpleasant... To not be wanted, all of a sudden. " He sighed. " You must be thinking so ill of me.... "

[Mirach]

"It's not true that you can't do anything," Svarik said. "Or that he doesn't want anything. But I believe it is hard to take in after your experiences. Because what he wants is for you to be content. That's how you show your appreciation."

[VisAnastasis]

" Yeah, why can't I just be a happy little kid, just play and eat and don't question my fortune? It's really not like my master is rationing everything he eats in order to stay with us longer. It's not like he looks starved even after he eats. That's a situation I can totally get behind. " Emmet ground the words through his teeth sarcastically. " How can... you even say such a thing? We are already taking advantage of him, by keeping him here, to teach us, to destroy and rebuild all this, when he should be, I don-t know... searching Beings to make deals with for food, looting bodies and whatnot... At the very least, it's not moral to be happy about making someone's life worse. I can't just.... accept to be content when he is not. What kind of person I'd be? "

[Mirach]

"One that locks you both in an infinite circle of worrying," Svarik muttered. "I know this is a bit of a crash course and a terrible time for it, but there are a few things you need to realize. First, there are people... or Beings... who genuinely care if you are happy, and it makes them happy in turn. Just so, not expecting anything from you. And second, there are things you can influence and there are things you can't. There are also things that are worth worrying about, and those that aren't. Worrying about something you can't influence is terrible strategy. You can't influence his dietary habits or his decision to stay. What you can influence is how he feels here. And also how quickly you learn, but that's where you are doing very well already. But the first part is harder. If you are content, he will be glad for it. And you may feel even better to see him glad. Better than a circle of worry, isn't it?"

[VisAnastasis]

" You are saying it like it is so easy. But there doesn't seem to really be the right thing to do. " the boy whispered with a vulnerable tremble in his voice. " Take... take something simple, for example. It's obvious being around too many humans makes his panicked and fearful... yet he never lets us out on our own anymore, and even goes on his own - to buy us food from humans. At first, the least I could go out of my way to make sure he has everything he needs to not have to leave the basement level where he feels safer... But now, he keeps an iron gaze at us - especially me. I am of consenting age, he says, and people that know me may find it as an excuse, he says. " he murmured. " It's... fine, I guess, to know he thinks it's so important... but it's really not. I don't feel like I can make his stay here easier if I can't do the little courtesies for him I could at the start. It's... too taxing for him. He keeps acting like we may die any day now. It's really not that bad. You... get used to it. And with most people, it doesn't feel that bad. Sometimes, it's even good enough. I am fine with the consequences of being of consenting age, as long as my age won't deter him from teaching me. I can take it as it comes... But why should he endure days of dread and panic? He is doing way too much, and way more than is good for him... "