Senecio adn Tide II

[VisAnastasis]

That seemed to get little Being thoughtful, as it didn't seem she thought about it like that.

" It feels... Up until now, Xia had not much to offer but her time. But it was not enough for Mister Death.... When something is not enough, should Xia not... Offer more? * She inquired vulnerably. * If Xia works hard to get him something he likes... Won't it prove... Xia's... Sincerity?*

" It is not quite that simple," Falcon tied in Svarik's point quietly. " Like Svarik said, balance is important. I think it would be good for you to work and earn, to build up more knowledge and confidence. But not out of desperation. Not just because you hope working hard will get you recognized more. Sometimes, you may do all the right things and still fail... In Death's case, we are speaking of very lonesome person, definitely. In such case, some money is alright, but time is more important..."

Critter sighed, conflicted.
* S-Svarik... Mister Svarik and Falcon will laugh if Xia says it. But it is hardest to give time to Mister Death... Because... Because Mister Death asked Xia to not call him uncle or Worth While no longer, * creature revealed with pain and definitive undertone of anger and bitterness in her expression, new unfamiliar feelings she struggled to deal with. * It is... Foolish of Xia, Xia knows. But Xia is upset. Xia gave her time freely, but this felt like more than time to give. To claim him as Xia's own... To mark him important to her. And Worth While... * She sighed wistfully while signing reverently, as if signing the  name of the whole world. * Xia... It was the nickname from the very heart. It was the most meaningful thing Xia could give. But Death said... It made him... Uncomfortable. * her hands were shaking angrily. * Xia... Is expected to spent time with him, but denied the biggest joy she had with him. Xia enjoyed loving him freely for a while now. Xia... Xia is made to love, Mister Svarik, but... Xia...  Has dark feels now. Xia wants to growl, yell, and bite... *

[Mirach]

"You are made to love and you encountered someone who's not ready for your love," Svarik said patiently. "He said he's uncomfortable being called Worth While? That says what he thinks of himself, not of you. He doesn't think he's worth loving and uncomfortable when someone does love him. From what I know, there's unrequired love in his past, one he wasn’t able to return. Maybe he's afraid you will want something he can't give, and he'll feel bad about it like he did before. With almost no experience in relationships, I'm afraid you picked the most complicated relationship to pursue, little one. But maybe it could work in your favour, if he is compelled to help you navigate it. For now though, just know that refusing your gift of a name doesn't say what he thinks of you, but what he thinks of himself. You gave him something he's not ready to accept. It's... not good, when one thinks like that, is it? It will need a lot of work before he can accept such a name from you, I fear. But instead of a rejection, you could see it as a goal."

[VisAnastasis]

Out of all their advice, it seemed this one was closest to Xia's heart. As she was gazing in the distance, her eyes seemed determined.
* Mister Svarik... is right. Mister Death is the most unsure nice creature Xia has met. Xia... gets things. Xia's... maker...  he desired Death to be a flowery rose tea. He is not. Death is an... intense tea of many gorgeous colours. * she wiggled her legs over the edge of the roof thoughtfully, as she added. * Xia likes what Death gives. It is reassuring and calming and warm. Just lot of tasty feelings. Cuddles and company... When he would hold Xia close for comfort, it rang true. Xia did not want anything but what she had. When Xia told Death she loved him... Xia said it for him. So Death can understand... Xia is choosing Death over Mister Svarik with joy, not... pity. * her face was serious. * He... is a stubborn acorn, Mister. Before, when  Xia treated him gently, he could accept it as her gentleness. But he will not accept that Xia prefers him for him. He wants... a pretense game. He wants... Xia to pretend she is nice to Death because she is nice Being, not because he is lovable Being. What a terrible game! How can Xia win? * she pondered a question beyond her grasp. * He is... cutting of Xia's ways of expressing love. He, he wants to win, Svarik. He will just keep... keep cutting off. Death... will be no comfortable until... until he takes away everything. Uncle, Worth While... it does not matter what is it. If Xia dares put love into it, he will not want it... And if it is not of love, then Xia will not enjoy it. It is game, but it feels no one will feel good for winning... Xia is afraid of no hard work. But when Death says he is fine with Xia being friend, it feels he wants a friendship only in name, not for real... What... what sort of friends... can not show affection? Mister Conrad looks of you and treats you like a nicest, softest bunny, Mister Svarik, and Mister Svarik always seems comfortable in it... he leaps into that love with no slightest hesitance or doubt... *

[Mirach]

"That is true," Svarik smiled a little at the choice of words. "But comparing it is like comparing a grown tree to a sapling - unjust to the little plant that just started to grow. And if you see a game you can't win, don't play it. Maybe don't talk to him about love and feelings, those things are very complicated to put to words, and for someone like him? No language may be sufficient to express the experience of such a vast creature. But love has many languages, not jusr words. Just being there might be enough, or being together while doing separate things. I have faith in you..."

[VisAnastasis]

At the last words, Xia couldn't help, despite her gloomy attitude from before, she smiled more widely with that, her feelings easily influenced, but this time in a positive light.
* N.no one... can cheer up Xia, as much as Svarik and Death. Thank you... Mister Svarik. That Svarik has faith in Xia...t-that... is enough. That at least... one big person... has faith, * she replied, her expression steadying. * Xia... did not expect a grand tree all sudden. But denial there is anything at all... It was... frustrating. He insists on no tree, but Xia has eyes. Something is there. But Svarik... is right. Xia can never win this game... but if Death can make games, Xia can make games. Can Xia not? * she grinned with little more mischief. * S-varik is good with games, and Xia is made in Svarik's image, so Xia will surely be good at games. Xia... does not think there is an easy solution now. But Xia will find a way, for sure. To be made in Svarik's image is no different than being made with sugar and spice and all nice. * her look, directed at him, was not of lonesomeness this time, but of admiration and awe, as one would look at an ideal person, an end goal one strives to reach, her eyes big with renewed hope. * If Svarik could, Xia can learn, too... *

[Mirach]

"Of course you can," Svarik smiled and opened his arms to offer her a hug.

[VisAnastasis]

Although most of the conversation she was disheartened and overwhelmed, it seemed Svarik giving her another perspective on the situation, in the end, gave her more ideas of how to deal with this, and knowing he believed in her helped a lot. She was shy but trustful, and she leaned toward him and embraced him fondly - not purring or wagging her tail this time, but still, seeming more content, drawing strength from his closeness as much as she could, knowing that he will soon leave and they might now see each other for a while.

[Mirach]

Svarik only let her go when he felt she wanted to pressing her shoulder once more encouragingly. 

[VisAnastasis]

Xia copied his gesture, and patted his shoulder with her little paw, determined not to let herself be saddened. When she retreated, her look was soft and grateful.
* Mister Svarik... Is... The maker of some of Xia's.. softest memories. Please, do not feel it as burden, but... Xia loves you.  * She admitted unsurely, because Death reacted so badly with same words. " Please, Mister Svarik... Do not trouble over it. Xia will not fight for Svarik's time or affection... Xia will not call Svarik friend or brother... But Xia will love Mister Svarik, far longer than forever. Far longer than thousands days,* she gulped. * So... So Svarik has to make a promise. Svarik must take three hairs from Xia's fur, and light them on fire, if he needs Xia's help. Because Xia loves him, Xia... Xia... Will worry for Mister Svarik a lot. Mister Svarik is soft, like cotton candy. Please, call Xia if something is bad... *

[Mirach]

"Thank you," Svarik nodded. "I will. But what if you want to call me? Will you send a message?"

[VisAnastasis]

* Xia... would not call Svarik just for missing him. And if Xia is in danger, is it not better to call... Mister Tide, or Mister Death? And Xia is sure Mister Sage and Mister Falcon already would have ways to contact you if they need your power, Mister Sunsh- Mister Svarik, * Xia replied shyly. * So Xia does not need it. Others have it. Just do know... Xia cares and misses you, even if Xia... decides not to call. Mister Svarik... is like cotton candy. Soft and tasty. Everyone wants a bite of him, always, * she smiled lightly. * So Xia does not want to add to the pressure, by calling him often. Svarik... should not come unless he has time. Kinging seems so complicated, but Xia knows kinging is important to Svarik, even if Mister Falcon does it better. But if Svarik works hard, Xia is sure Svarik can do better, too! Xia will work hard to improve her friending, and Svarik should have time away from playing with Xia to improve kinging too! Maybe even become a main king, like Tide is the main king here in the Sea Kingdom. Svarik surely can! Xia believes in you, too! * she signed her observation encouragingly with passion, as from her angle, it must have looked they are doing the job together, like Sage, Hans and Tide are, only with Conrad having the lead, and, while it still was praise from the kid, it seemed hilarious to Conrad, who snickered at it playfully, bemused at how she sow the situation.

[Mirach]

Svarik grinned as well. "Thank you for a honest assessment," he said. "I'll try my best."

[VisAnastasis]

Xia was glad both her admission of love was not shunned, even if not returned, and that her encouragement was accepted, as she sow it. She stood up then, and standing before him, although she was tiny, she looked solemn, as she plucked three hair from her cheek, and offered them to meadow king.
* Xia knows you will be the bestest. You silly man who holds the sun and grass and dew in his name... You are the strongest sweetest flower.  You can do anything you choose,* she signed with her free hand gently, watching him intently, as if to carve his image into her memory.* Thank you for choosing to take this... And goodbye. *

[Mirach]

"You can, too," Svarik said, carefully taking the hairs.

[VisAnastasis]

It seemed it was as much as Xia could take, not able to stay any longer, as it would be too hard to part otherwise, temptation to stay at Svarik's side being too great.
* Thank you for the cake... *.She smiled a little, bowed lightly, and before they could say anything more, she suddenly slipped through the layers, and the two men were alone upon the roof once again.

[Mirach]

"Main king, yes?" Svarik muttered with a slight smile as he watched the place where she stood a moment ago. "It seems I have a goal set out for me..."

[VisAnastasis]

" Don't be bothered by it much, " said Conrad, who, despite his words, was clearly in an improved mood after such an innocent assessment. " Xia is nice and all, but she thinks you are the best at playing and only need to improve kinging, " he nudged him with his hand innocently, as he added," I, on the other hand, don't think you're nearly good enough at playing... You had been involved in way too many grim things these months... You should focus on playing way more. I can't do this without you, but, " he looked away thoughtfully as if a little embarrassed to say it while looking. " I can focus on doing the gritty work, and you can focus on doing public work, so your presence is felt and people are not anxious and don't suspect your absence. If we plan well and make decisions in advance, I can buy you more days like these, more often... "  

[Mirach]

"I would prefer if we work together and well organized so that we can buy ourselves more days like these..." Svarik said. 

[VisAnastasis]

Falcon was a little unsure with that, looking somewhat somberly into the distance, as if torn about something.
" I am not really sure it would be... Best choice for you. I am not really good with all the... playing business," he then replied quietly." Honestly, I am already itching to deal with the new things on our plate - it's not exactly atmosphere you can relax in and focus on yourself. Like, seeing what can be done about theathe corruption? Pretty neat thing right there. Observing useful Beings around whose talents could be used on interesting cool ways? Helping solve Eros's perpetual state of house arest? Hell, why not even further religious reforms to make our little politeism more complex? Just my cup of tea," Falcon smiled a little faintly. " I don't really think you can rest well with me, when we will be together all the time working in the capital all the time... You will need a breather from me... "

[Mirach]

"I don't think I'm too different in that," Svarik said. "My relaxing tends to turn into healing everyone around... Going to a new place to get away from duties? That's just a great way of finding new people to help."

[VisAnastasis]

" Well, no kidding... it makes sense when you put it like that. "  Falcon snorted a little through his nose." But still - you still got to have some fun on last trip, right? Erdel and Xia were really well picked companions to help you have fun, I think. You was healing all around, but you also had time for yourself. I'd rather you have that, than me obsesing around. If your life was not in danger last night, I would have already dragged you around all local priesthoods to secure better mobility for Eros, or drag you around around Janus aiming to win his favour - I am specifically interested in the two right now," he smiled apologetically, guilty as charged" Aren't you, like, really glad I am not throwing my boring hoby of meddling at you right now?"

[Mirach]

"If I wasn't feeling that drained, I'd happily go meddling with you. But you need some rest too, so we're not going anywhere. You get some sleep and I'll have a chat with Eros about some matters of heart, since he's the expert."

[VisAnastasis]

" Yes... Just... I have no idea what exactly you want to talk about, so if you feel depressed afterwards, you promise to wake me up so I can spoil you till you feel better?" he spoke calmly of what was already comfortable routine between them, and then, he admitted with a heavier sigh what he didn't ask often. " And, just a quick question... tomorrow, could you maybe dedicate some time... To going to do the priestly things with me? I think we could find decent uses for Eros, and I'd like to have a good start with him by doing him a properly dramatic favour, but... I can write up documents to hand to priests, but it's one thing for them to be delivered by a shady nameless guy or with a solemn demand from a king with the blessing of the Bull. It's frustrating to admit, but it's one of those few things that... you know, it's one of those spotlight things that I can't do, or, hmm, delegate, to anyone but you if it is to have best results... "

[Mirach]

"Of course I will," Svarik rolled his eyes. "You should know I'm glad when I can be useful instead of dumping all the work on you so that I can have fun, Mr. Main King."

[VisAnastasis]

Falcon grinned a little with the absurd title and seemed a little placated, although not fully relaxed yet about it.
" Alright, we'll decide what's best to do tomorrow, dear little Kingling... And... I am sorry. I know it's ridiculous, but it's really hard to ask you directly. If it is giving orders, I am used to it, but you are above me, and I can not do it like I can with Erdel, and I don't really want to pressure you, you know? But it's really troublesome to just... ask it like a request. " he sighed, with some unsure embarrassment unfamiliar and unusual of him. " As I said, I know it's ridiculous to be on the edge for such things after everything we've been through, and I am working on it... It is just way easier to manipulate you into ending up making decisions I want you to make without having to ask you, but I know I can't keep doing it forever if we are to...  remain friends... "